The Log and the Speck

Matthew 7:3
3 Why do you see the speck that is in your brother's eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye?

In a short conversation with a friend on Facebook about what gets Christians fired up or offended, it dawned on me that I think we have a big problem with what we consider a log and what we consider a speck. For example, sins such as homosexuality, abortion, murder, etc are often big ones that get a lot of attention. They are the logs in people's eyes that are easily discerned. When someone is in a relationship with someone from the same sex...log alert. When someone has an abortion...log alert.  When someone is killed by someone or there is a mass shooting..log alert. Cue the Facebook posts because something has to change.

Meanwhile, the more commonplace, widespread sins are considered specks that are often overlooked because they are less discernible. Let's take greed.  How do you know if someone is greedy? Or materialism. How do you know when someone's earthly possessions are becoming their treasure? Or gluttony. Or pride. Or lust. Or laziness. Or hatred. Or selfishness. All of these sins are less measurable. They are not black and white like a homosexual relationship, an abortion, or a murder. In fact, we probably all do these sins. So since these are so widespread and commonplace and also personal, we often consider these sins specks. In fact, there is always someone way worse than us at these, so our sin probably isn't that bad or may not even be at the point of being sinful in our own minds.

But what would the world look like if all of these speck sins were flipped and considered logs and the logs were considered specks? What if greed got us Christians fired up and offended? What if we tried to stay away from greed at all costs? And went out of our way to live simply in order to avoid materialism.  What if we instead shared our possessions and tried to only eat what we needed so that starving people could have food? What if pride was such a big log that we used every breath and effort to lift others up and consider others more than ourselves? What if even the hint of lust was something we tried to run from? What if we were so scared of hatred that we were able to forgive even our enemies? 

What would that kind of world look like if Christians flipped the script and cared more about the less easily discernible sins?  I think all of a sudden we would see a world where we see less people starving, less people living in poverty, less broken families and orphans, less abortions, less murders, less sexual abuse, less racism, etc. In fact, oftentimes I think the causes of the logs as we currently know them would go away in a world where we care more about the specks. Jesus summed it all up in two commandments. Basically, love God and love others. What if we put love up on a pedestal and were offended at anything that did not look like love? No matter how widespread or commonplace it is. Like maybe greed, materialism, lust, laziness, hatred, etc. All those real logs that all of us have. Another thing I see lately that seems to get people fired up is fear. Fear of terrorists, fear of immigrants, fear of police, fear of guns, etc, etc etc. My guess is those all go away too. For there is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear (1 John 4:18) So lets do it. Lets flip the script. Instead of focusing on the logs and things we fear, lets focus on love and all those seemingly mundane, little specks that are blinding us all.

But especially on this Good Friday, let's remember what this love looks like that enters the death, darkness, and bondage of this world and provides life, light, and freedom. This love does not look anything like comfort and convenience that our culture aspires to. The giving of yourself is going to be hard. Its going to cost a lot. Focusing on ridding ourselves of the logs such as greed or selfishness will definitely be hard. It can change the world. But the road will be difficult. Just ask Jesus.

Love Drives out Fear

Lately as I prepare to travel to Bogota to visit Tatiana and Lorena, I have had some fears about going.  The friend I am going with said that gang violence is becoming more prevalent and we aren't exactly sure what type of situations that their sisters are currently in. But God has been teaching me lately to trust in Him.

Last night was one of those ways he subtly taught me about trusting in Him.  It has become quite routine the last few months for Josiah to come into our room in the middle of the night scared because he had a bad dream. Every night I get up and go back and lie down next to him in his bed and he puts his arm around me and falls right back to sleep.  What fears he has before are all gone the moment I am with him.  Last night as I was laying next to him as he fell back asleep, I felt God telling me, "Trust in me as your Father as he trusts you." I don't have to fear because God is always with me.

Another thing happened last night that has already made the trip worth it. Kasey and I were talking to Dany and Sol about Youth group at church where they had just talked about love.  And Sol said that she had been thinking that me planning to go to Bogota to see her sisters has really shown her love. I knew that me doing this would help connect and bond us by her seeing what love does, but I didn't think I would hear her verbalize those thoughts so soon.  Because that is definitely hard for her.  It is amazing the ways we are seeing God work and move among us. Please continue to pray for my trip and our whole family as we continue to try to follow where God leads us.

God's Continuing Story

Knowing that God has such a heart for orphans (James 1:27) led us to adopt Daniela and Sol Angie over a year ago.  I have often been in awe of God when we see Him work in so many situations and provide exactly what we need when we needed it. And it is amazing what God is teaching us through it all. One of those things is about deep love. You see, Dany and Sol have two sisters who were too old to be adopted and had to stay in Colombia where they have no family support in their lives. So Dany and Sol take most of the money that they receive (whether through allowance, or birthdays, holidays, etc) and they save it to send back to their sisters.  They have said that they have everything they need so why would they not give everything that they have to their sisters? No wonder James also says in chapter 2 that God has chosen those who are poor in the eyes of the world to be rich in faith. It has touched my heart to see how they have continually given everything they have to their sister. 

And now as I think about James 2:14-16, I feel God leading me to go to them and see what we can do to help.  There is a lot of need there. God has already provided me with a great friend from Colombia who when I said that I wanted to go instantly said that he would go with me. I don't know what this trip has in store.  We are just praying that God will lead us and work in amazing ways as he always does. I do know that we will get to go to them give them a hug and tell them they are loved.  We will get to give them a care package from their sisters and our family.  Another friend of ours at Mosaic has also connected us to a family member who is a pastor at a church there.  I am praying that we can connect them to people who can help and support them locally.  I am praying that the family of God will take them in and give them the nurturing and mentoring and assistance that we can't give them from so far away.  We will be able to get a better idea of their needs and situation and how we can help, including providing some of those needs while we are there.  

Please pray for us as we set out on this journey.  Pray for safe travels and that we will be able to connect well with them.  It will not be easy as they have to borrow phones to even communicate. Pray for our families as we are gone.  Pray for God to work in the lives of these two sisters who have life harder than many of us can even imagine.  

And if any of you would like to assist us financially in this story, please let us know.  We are trusting in God's provision to even make this trip possible as there are so many expenses (plane tickets, transportation, meals, etc).  We could not do any of this without our "village" supporting us through it all. You mean so much to us.  All the prayers, encouraging words, thoughtful gifts, and acts of service to our family help us so much in this journey. God is good! 

James 1:27 - "Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world."

James 2:14-16 - "What good is it, my brothers and sisters, if someone claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save them? Suppose a brother or a sister is without clothes and daily food. If one of you says to them, "Go in peace; keep warm and well fed," but does nothing about their physical needs, what good it it?"

Letter from a Birmingham Jail - Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

(After writing this post today, I saw tonight the fatal police shooting of another unarmed black man with his hands in the air. I left my post unchanged, but my heart is breaking).  #TerrenceCrutcher

In light of all the controversy and conversations occuring because of Colin Kaepernick sitting for the national anthem, I have really tried to listen to the voices of my few black friends. And yes, I did say "few".  I have realized lately that I do not have enough black friends because we still live in a very segregated world. I have to be more intentional about that and plan to do so. Anyway, thanks to my friend Kwesi Johnson, I came upon Dr. King's letter from a Birmingham jail. It is a good read, but it is a really long letter, so I took out a few of the highlights that stood out to me or happen to reverberate in today's current environment. Dr King is obviously looked up to and respected by many.  I have seen his name used in both sides of the issue, so I thought I would post some of these excerpts because they are impactful even many years after it was written. So much wisdom in his words. Enjoy!

Excerpts from Dr. Kings Letter from a Birmingham Jail. - April, 16, 1963

"Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere. We are caught in an inescapable network of mutuality, tied in a single garment of destiny. Whatever affects one directly, affects all indirectly."

"You deplore the demonstrations taking place in Birmingham. But your statement, I am sorry to say, fails to express a similar concern for the conditions that brought about the demonstrations. I am sure that none of you would want to rest content with the superficial kind of social analysis that deals merely with effects and does not grapple with underlying causes."

“You may well ask, “Why direct action? Why sit-ins, marches, etc.? Isn’t negotiation a better path?” You are exactly right in your call for negotiation. Indeed, this is the purpose of direct action. Nonviolent direct action seeks to create such a crisis and establish such creative tension that a community that has constantly refused to negotiate is forced to confront the issue. It seeks so to dramatize the issue that it can no longer be ignored.”

"Lamentably, it is an historical fact that privileged groups seldom give up their privileges voluntarily. Individuals may see the moral light and voluntarily give up their unjust posture; but, as Reinhold Niebuhr has reminded us, groups tend to be more immoral than individuals."

"Actually, we who engage in nonviolent direct action are not the creators of tension. We merely bring to the surface the hidden tension that is already alive. We bring it out in the open, where it can be seen and dealt with. Like a boil that can never be cured so long as it is covered up but must be opened with all its ugliness to the natural medicines of air and light, injustice must be exposed, with all the tension its exposure creates, to the light of human conscience and the air of national opinion before it can be cured."

"I have almost reached the regrettable conclusion that the Negro’s great stumbling block in the stride toward freedom is not the White Citizens Counciler or the Ku Klux Klanner, but the white moderate who is more devoted to ‘order’ than to justice; who prefers a negative peace which is the absence of tension to a positive peace which is the presence of justice; who constantly says, ‘I agree with you in the goal you seek, but I can’t agree with your methods of direct action’; who paternalistically feels that he can set the timetable for another man’s freedom.’ … Shallow understanding from people of good will is more frustrating than absolute misunderstanding from people of ill will. Lukewarm acceptance is much more bewildering than outright rejection."

"In your statement you asserted that our actions, even though peaceful, must be condemned because they precipitate violence. But can this assertion be logically made? Isn’t this like condemning the robbed man because his possession of money precipitated the evil act of robbery? … We must come to see, as federal courts have consistently affirmed, that it is immoral to urge an individual to withdraw his efforts to gain his basic constitutional rights because the quest precipitates violence. Society must protect the robbed and punish the robber."

"And I am further convinced that if our white brothers dismiss as "rabble rousers" and "outside agitators" those of us who employ nonviolent direct action, and if they refuse to support our nonviolent efforts, millions of Negroes will, out of frustration and despair, seek solace and security in black nationalist ideologies--a development that would inevitably lead to a frightening racial nightmare."

"But the judgment of God is upon the church as never before. If today's church does not recapture the sacrificial spirit of the early church, it will lose its authenticity, forfeit the loyalty of millions, and be dismissed as an irrelevant social club with no meaning for the twentieth century. Every day I meet young people whose disappointment with the church has turned into outright disgust."

"I have tried to make clear that it is wrong to use immoral means to attain moral ends. But now I must affirm that it is just as wrong, or perhaps even more so, to use moral means to preserve immoral ends. "

"One day the South will know that when these disinherited children of God sat down at lunch counters, they were in reality standing up for what is best in the American dream and for the most sacred values in our Judaeo Christian heritage, thereby bringing our nation back to those great wells of democracy which were dug deep by the founding fathers in their formulation of the Constitution and the Declaration of Independence."

"If I have said anything in this letter that overstates the truth and indicates an unreasonable impatience, I beg you to forgive me. If I have said anything that understates the truth and indicates my having a patience that allows me to settle for anything less than brotherhood, I beg God to forgive me."

"Let us all hope that the dark clouds of racial prejudice will soon pass away and the deep fog of misunderstanding will be lifted from our fear drenched communities, and in some not too distant tomorrow the radiant stars of love and brotherhood will shine over our great nation with all their scintillating beauty."
 

May the Gospel Shine Through

My heart is breaking for our nation tonight. As I think about what is happening, the one thing that keeps coming to my mind is that this is where the gospel should shine its brightest. People are searching for answers, and short of Jesus Christ and God's love we are bound to fall short of coming close to any answer. 

 

A common theme seems to be that love is the answer. But love as the world knows it will still fail. It is an emotion that has to compete with other emotions such as fear, disgust, anger, etc. But the gospel is about a love that surpasses everything. There is no fear in love, but perfect love drives out fear. (1 John 4:18). It speaks of loving your neighbor as yourself. And neighbor means everyone, including your enemies. So that means loving those who persecute you, who hate you, who you fear, or even disgust you. And this is hard. But we have an example of that love in the Bible. Of someone who could be put to death and still call out for their forgiveness. 

 

Our nation seems to look like one of people who have lost sight of the gospel. In this time of divisiveness, we need to hear the words of Ephesians that say, "Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace." Those of you in the black community, I am sorry. I am sorry for the racism and discrimination that still exists. For those of you in law enforcement who do not feel appreciated or even feel despised, I am sorry. I pray that God's love will shine through which is the only way to bring unity and peace to a world that is broken. And that doesn't happen overnight. I will be the first to admit that I have fear, anger, disgust, hate, etc in me that I constantly have to battle against. But by God's grace, I am becoming more like Love everyday.

Showing Up - Insights from a Funeral

God’s been working on me a lot lately and I wanted to share just a little of what he has put on my heart.  Back in June, one of my favorite preachers who lives back in Abilene gave a sermon called Mundane Miracles after being with a family who celebrated a wedding and had a funeral in the same weekend.  Here is a quick summary.  He talks of Jesus and how over and over again we see Jesus right in the middle of regular old life.  In his first miracle in John we see him at a wedding and then at his last miracle in John we see him at a funeral.  He attends parties and send-offs, preaches to thousands or sits down and talks to one person.  So in this sermon, he talks about how often the kingdom of God at work in our lives is just showing up. Just being there. Making your face known, smiling and nodding, or saying sorry for your loss. To just be there in the yuckiness and junk of life and also in the joys of life.  

He tells of a story of when he was 13 years old and his teenage cousin died in a car accident.  Soon after he died, people started showing up at his house. But he had to get away so he went outside and started shooting baskets.  After a while of this, a man from the church came outside, walked right by him and just started rebounding and throwing  him back the ball as he shot without saying a word.  As he continued to do this, Damon’s anger eventually turned to tears and he broke down.  At that point, the man came to him, put his hand on his shoulder, and said, “Damon, I’m sorry.” and went inside. And at the moment it brought a little piece of Jesus right to where he was by just have a willingness to be there. To just love him where he was in the moment.  This story made a huge impact on me when I heard it.  He also told of how shortly after his wedding, he had a death in his wife’s family and his parents, who had just driven 5 hours back to their home, had turned around and driven back to just be there and sit and attend a funeral before going back again.  When we show up and just be there we carry the love of Jesus with us even if we don’t know what to say or do. This sermon made an impact on me and I often thought about it, but it didn’t really sink in for me until this weekend.

 

You see this weekend was the memorial service for my brother-in-law who committed suicide last week.  What has meant the most to me over the past week or so is the people who showed up.  As we were sitting there waiting for the service to start, in walked one of our dear friends who lives in Macon, GA. And my eyes filled with tears as she told Kasey she was there for her.  Then there was the Owens family who made the trek down from North Carolina with their 5 kids to be there for the funeral. And as if that wasn’t enough, they came over that night and brought around 10 pizzas, including gluten-free pizzas for us to enjoy.  Their generosity and willingness to let God work through them moved me so much. Then there was Larry Cline who drove down from Tennessee to speak at the memorial, only to have to drive right back and preach on Sunday.  Then there were friends from Orlando such as Kasey’s friend Kristin, our preacher Cary and his wife, and a good friend Cheree who came over for the funeral even though they did not even know Seth at all. But just showed up for us. Then there was the people from Seth’s place of work whose presence did something that others did not.  You see they did not know anyone there, but must have spent countless hours with Seth as they worked.  Them showing up told me that Seth must have impacted their lives in some way.  You probably just don’t show up to a funeral unless that person has brought some kind of joy to your life, or been nice to you, or just been a good person that meant something to you.  So them showing up let me know Seth was making a difference even when he might not have thought he was. Then there was the many people who brought us food the week of his death.  Kasey did not have to make many meals that week because they kept coming. One person just left us a bowl of fruit at our door. They accounted for allergies and went above and beyond to make things easier for us. Then there was our friend Marissa who watched the kids on multiple occasions so that Kasey could have time to grieve and go to appointments. These are just a few of the people who showed up. That lended a hand. That gave us their presence as a way of showing God’s love to us.

As I remember my dad’s funeral, what I remember the most is the standing-room only, packed out auditorium full of people who showed up.  Who each came by and gave us hugs as they walked by.  And I remember people bringing us food and being there. And actually, to this day I still have a card in my Bible that one of his students, who was a friend from elementary school, sent us that I happened to keep.  I don’t remember if it was the only card sent by a student.  But Demetrius Collins sent a card with Psalms 55:22 written on it and some words of encouragement.  All he wrote was “God Bless”.  And I have kept it ever since.  I don’t know if I ever told him that or not, though we ended up being in the same club in college. But he sent his love through a card, like so many have also done during this time.  So as I reflect on this, I am encouraged that I need to start doing a better job at showing up.  Because now I remember how it feels when someone does.

We were originally planning to have the funeral outside at some gardens across from Kasey’s parent’s house.  But it was a good thing that God brought some rain that day.  Because we had underestimated God’s family. Because when we moved it to a church, the church was nearly full. And with all the people who showed up, it was as if Jesus himself showed up as well. With the peace and comfort that only He can. 

Thank you everyone who showed up!

Living the Dream

I have a friend at church who also reminds me that I am "living the dream." On Sunday afternoons both Kasey and I each take a turn watching the kiddos and the other gets to rest or do whatever they want for a couple of hours.  Today, during the first part of my rest time, I continued reading "Choosing to See", by Mary Beth Chapman.  She is the wife of Steven Curtis Chapman. In this book she talks a lot about their life including the loss of their 4 year-old adopted daughter from China who was tragically hit by a car in their driveway.  What was even harder was that the car was being driven by their son. If you have never had a chance to read it, it is a very insightful look into both the overwhelming grief and also the hope we have because of Jesus through it all.

But the reason I felt compelled to write is because she just talked about how she wished she could have just taken in different moments before the accident.  As I was reading this, I could hear the girls singing downstairs, "Let it go!!" from the Disney movie Frozen. And I just wanted to take time to reflect on our wonderful kids.

Elly is now 5 years old and what a great joy to us. It is amazing to see the development of children every day. Elly is learning to read right now. She reads a few pages of her children's Bible each night to us.  She got that Bible as a graduation present from her VPK school. Elly has a heart for God and always wants to do what is right.  She has a very tender heart.  One of my favorite memories of her lately is when Kasey and I were talking about adoption.  (We eventually want to adopt and add to our family). Elly is super excited about this. When we were talking about this, somehow it came up that there were costs to this.  Our then 4 year-old Elliana got a beam on our face.  She said something like, "That's great because you can use my money." It was so cool so see her offer up everything she had. She also suggested that we might want to adopt a 9 year-old.  She obviously is picturing adopting a "Gwen" who played so well with her when we went to the adoption of their cousin Gabby.  Elly is always singing church songs out loud wherever she goes.  Whether she is outside swinging, whether we are on a walk, whether she is alone in the bathroom.  It doesn't matter. We recently took Elly to Cracker Barrel for her 5th birthday celebration.  It was a special time because Kasey and I got to take just her to celebrate.  One of the highlights was seeing Elly dig in to the dessert they brought her.  Since there are so many allergies in our house, Elly rarely gets to have anything good even though she could as long as it doesn't have colors.  Well the free birthday dessert just happened to be some kind of Blondie cookie with ice-cream.  The look on Elly's face as she dived in was priceless.   I think she must have been afraid that someone would take it or mom and I would eat too much because she ate it faster than I have ever seen her eat.  We then got to play her first game of checkers where her and I destroyed Mommy.  Kasey then had to do a quick Target run and Elly and I sneakily followed her and spied on her the whole time without her knowing. Elly at this point was on a ridiculous sugar high and was laughing at everything that was said.  Elly is also extremely good at impersonating and doing voices.  The other day I was making a reference to a Thomas show and said to Lily, "You have caused confusion and delay." Lily was like, huh? But Elly then said the same thing nailing the British accent and Lily could then laugh at it.  She definitely got that talent from Kasey because all my voices sound the same no matter what I am going for.

Lily is now 3 and a half years old and also a great joy to our family.  Lily is going to be the life of the party when she grows up.  With Lily you never know what you are going to get.  She is unpredictable in every way.  And I love it.  Lily always wants to give me a hug and kiss anytime I leave for work and also at night. Lily also likes to sing songs out loud, but she likes to make up her own songs. She throws God and Jesus and other Bible stories into her songs along with rainbows and princesses.  Lily learns things just by being around when Elly is learning.  Actually Lily usually just teaches herself things.  If you told her  you wanted to teach her something, she probably would not want to.  She is awesome at computer games.  So not surprisingly, she also has began to read early. However, she is just starting but it has led to some funny things.  For example, the other night she was trying to read the creation story in her Bible. A lot of times she just sees the first letter and guesses what the word or sentence will be.  So it read, God made the first man.  His name was Adam. God also created a b..... Here is where Lily decided to take off with her own story.  Obviously the B stood for Big Hairy Monster.  Sorry ladies, in Lily's version God created Man and a Big Hairy Monster.  This caused us to die laughing which has only led her to make up things more often.  So we try not to laugh as much anymore.  Just as Elly is good with voices, Lily makes me laugh with her faces.  She can make the funniest faces and can also replicate anything silly.  After we watched Monsters Inc, she would crack us up every time she would say, "I'm watching you, always watching" in her silly monster voice.

Josiah is almost two and is also a great joy to our family.  He is a man after his mother's own heart. Because he looks just like me, except likes to be clean and organized (not like me).  He always likes things to be put away.  When he gets done with a bowl, he will put it in the sink.  He sometimes even puts other people's bowls in the sink.  His laugh and smile is so awesome.  At Elly's birthday party not too long ago I heard over and over again how cute and well-mannered Josiah was. He just wondered around being happy. (He loves birthday parties because of one word, "Cake").  Right now I love singing "If You're Happy and You Know It" with him at night because he loves to raise both arms in the air and shout. "AMEN!" He loves doing whatever his sisters are doing. He loves to play Hide and Seek and count to 10.  The girls love to do "Iceskating" after watching the Olympics. Josiah gets right in there and ice skates with them (dancing around the room and doing tricks).  He especially loves the entrance.  He also loves putting on princess shoes and tries to put on the dresses. I am trying to steer him away from this and am looking forward to giving him some more manly stuff for his birthday. He loves trains right now.  In fact, if he is awake, he wants to watch Thomas the Train.  Josiah is also going to be our engineer.  He is always trying to figure out how things work.  Unlike me who made my brother figure out how things work growing up. (Now Dustin knows how to make a lot of things work which I don't).  Today I let him ride the elevator from church today so he has said, "Elevator, Button, Up and Down" about 1,000 times (No exaggeration).  There is nothing sweeter than hearing Josiah say, "Daddy!!!!"  His favorite word right now is probably  "No" which he thinks is the appropriate answer to any question you ask him.

Elly and Lily have both now learned to swim.  Just yesterday, we were over at a friends pool for a birthday party and Lily had lost her confidence.  But slowly she gained it back and swam the short way across the pool.  I love watching my children conquer fear.  This is really helpful here in Florida.  Josiah, on the other hand, thinks (or wishes) he can swim.  He loves to jump in to Daddy.  He can float on his back when in trouble but I can't wait until he learns as well.

Along with the joys come the difficulties of having three kids.  Josiah already thinks he is two so he has started tantrums. Along with Lily's unpredictability comes crazy outbursts and pooping in her pants even though she is potty trained.  And yes, Elly and Lily are best friends but can also make each other super mad and fight.  But through it all, Kasey especially is doing a wonderful job.  She starts homeschooling Elly next year. She is pretty awesome.

My rest time is now up.  So I am going to head downstairs and continue "living the dream." And I will soak it all in right now while I can.  Because just like the Chapmans, things could change any moment.  But God is Good.  And will always be no matter what.  But I will try to always take in the blessings and the moments while they are here.